letters to my life.

Dear work, you were pretty hard on me last week.  I hope you cool your jets this week, for literal crying out loud.

Dear bachelorette party, you were so much fun on Saturday.  But apparently wearing a slip under my dress and going home at 7:30 makes me old?  I guess I’m cool with that.

Dear driver in the red car this morning,  I’m sorry for accidentally flashing you my upper thigh on the street earlier.  I don’t know when I’ll learn my lesson that skirts + biking don’t mix.

Dear kale, get out of my teeth gap.  I felt you settle in there 30 mins ago and you’ve now overstayed your welcome. Work with me here.

Dear new gym, we’re thinking of trying you out tonight.  Although the thought is nauseating, since I haven’t hung out with the likes of you in months…

Dear Minneapolis, I miss you.

Dear parents, I love you but don’t get your hopes up after that last one.

Dear wine, is it appropriate to drink you after the gym tonight?  Let’s discuss.

Dear bug bite on my cheek that I thought was a zit, I’m really sorry that I messed with you yesterday.  I made an assumption about you and that was wrong of me.  I can see that you’re getting back at me now by tripling in size and itchiness.   Thanks for that.

Dear kale again, we did it!

Dear work elevator, this was highly appropriate today:

Dear blog readers, hello I love you goodbye.

P.S. Letters to my life Volumes 1 and 2.

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letters to my life.

Dear new house, I love you so much.  But can you please unpack yourself?  I think you owe it to us after we spent 5 days painting your insides.

Dear neighbors, so far you all seem a little goofy.  We should fit right in.

Dear weekend, you look hot.  Literally.  84 degrees.  You saucy minx, you….

Dear Mom & Brother, I can’t wait to see your sweet midwest faces tomorrow!

Dear Mom & Brother again, Do you remember what 84 degrees feels like?  It’s warm.

Dear painting, you’re a little b*tch.  No wonder no one likes you.  If only you weren’t so dirty and time-consuming…

Dear Dad, thank you for helping us move last weekend.  You’re the best.  Dad’s like you deserve a medal.  A medal made out of whiskey.

Dear current job, tomorrow we shall part ways.  I will miss all your beer, and I’ll miss all your people.  Well, all your people except for one.  I will not miss him.  I wish him a lifetime of painting.

Dear future job, I’ll see you next Tuesday.  Can you please be gentle?  You scare the fack out of me.

Dear vitamins, where you at yo?  I can’t seem to find you in any of our boxes and I’m worried about developing osteoporosis after all the painting.  (there’s a correlation there, right?)

Dear feet, I think you smell today?  But you shouldn’t because I showered and I’m wearing slightly new shoes.  Let’s discuss.

Dear coworker, I’m sorry if you caught a glimpse of me smelling my feet.

Dear me, blog more.

Dear you, thanks for stopping by!  xx